Emerging Artist: Matthew Solberg

Chanced upon a link on the side of my Facebook page that said something about downloading free music, so obviously I had to check it out. Turns out, it's by an up-and-coming musician named Matthew Solberg from his album "I Am a Fool." What I've heard so far I happen to like.

According to the information on his website, he appears to be influenced by a couple of artists whom I happen to absolutely love, namely The Beatles and Nick Drake. The Nick Drake influence is quite apparent in the songs Liquid Blanket and Saving Disgrace, and that's a good thing. It's my personal opinion, of course, but I think these songs have been rendered quite nicely. If anything, I think the backing vocals for a couple of songs will have to be slightly altered to bring out the beautifully haunting melody of Solberg's trademark "finger style method of guitar-playing." His melodious chord transitions and seemingly fluid style are pleasing to the ears, and when you close your eyes, the effect is altogether dreamy.

You can download the entire album from his site, and I urge you to give him a listen. I would like to wish him all the best for his music career, mostly because I think he has a lot of potential, and partially because I'm jealous and wish I'd spent more time playing the guitar and trying to marry the tunes in my head to the words that I never wrote. Just kidding. Hats off to Mr. Solberg for his effort. I wish him every success. My personal recommendations are the songs that I mentioned in the previous paragraph: Liquid Blanket and Saving Disgrace.

I don't imagine myself turning to God very often, or at all, come to think of it. But on this day, the first day of the year 2010, I found myself asking for something. I prayed that I would be consumed by a fire. A large, roaring blaze that would completely consume every fiber of my being, leaving nothing but ashen remains, so light that they would float away on the slightest of zephyrs. Now, before any of you start pitying me and my apparently suicidal tendencies, I urge you to hold on to your proverbial horses. I wish to be consumed by divine flames so that I may arise from them anew.

I can't put my finger on it, but this thought of trying to get myself to face the ultimate test of some kind just kept butting into my head, like the song that you hate but you just cannot stop humming because it's stuck on repeat for the entire day. And, it made me think about the way life has been, and the way life was, and the way in which there are some people who spend a lot of their time worrying about how things will turn out for them, while there are others who are perfectly happy with their lot. This was a sort of precursor to wondering about what makes people turn to God. Usually it's wanting something. Money. Good luck. Bad luck for someone you hate. Children. The winning lottery ticket, to be redundant. Sometimes, it's a real need, or at least, something that we cannot quite classify as a "want". Then, sometimes, there are situations of absolute desperation where the way before you, literally and figuratively, seems to disappear, and you find yourself almost instinctively looking up at the heavens, a prayer on your lips, just asking for a hand to hold, or a shoulder to lean on, while you take that next step; a leap of faith into the unknown. There could be all sorts of people around you, but you don't reach out for any mortal hand. You seek divine intervention.

That's why this email forward that I received, the image that you see at the top of this post, struck me as being so poignantly, hauntingly true. You don't know if it's you who leads you to the edge, or if you find yourself there. But that's not the important thing. No. It's all about what you do when you get to the edge. When you look over the side and see nothing...a much scarier proposition than being able to see jagged rocks or some manner of "ground" beneath. So, come to think of it, maybe that's what prompted me to ask for the trial by fire. I could have asked for wings, or some other form of assistance that was less drastic, but no.

This is it in my life. It's now or never. I'm beyond the edge. I'm in a state of free fall. So, this morning, when I opened my eyes, I didn't wish for peace on Earth, or the safe-keeping of all life as we know it. No. I asked that I be liberated from all worry and forethought about each and every passing day. I asked that I be able to rise from the eternal blaze, like the legendary phoenix. I'm going to learn how to fly. Who says I need wings. It's up to God to let me fly or fall. Even if I fall, what's the worst thing that can happen.

:-)

Happy New Year everyone! Have an awesome year and an even better decade!

R.I.P. Panda Kutty

We lost "Panda Kutty" today, sometime in the evening. She hadn't been well for a couple of days now, and although it looked like she was coming through yesterday, well, I guess she didn't make it. Poor thing.

Now, she isn't the only kitten that's died in the couple of months that I've been back home, here in Sri Vilas, but she was the one I was most attached to. I had a major soft spot for her and would let her get away with pretty much anything. In fact, I was often in awe of her because she seemed to flout all the "rules" that people seemed to set forward for most of the other feline denizens of our humble abode. And, true to this kind of form, she used to often treat me like her own private doormat, by climbing into my lap whenever she wanted to, and going to sleep, or cleaning herself from this new found perch.

The name "Panda Kutty" was given to her by my uncle who thought she resembled a baby panda (which is what the name translates into, "kutty" meaning baby or child in Malayalam) when she was only a week old. Late this evening, together with my uncle, we buried Panda Kutty in the back yard. It wasn't a particularly sorrowful farewell. I think we were both glad that her suffering had finally come to an end. Still, it was a bitter pill to swallow. And, I know he was trying to deal with the hurting inside the way he furiously and consistently went about digging her little feline grave, repeatedly telling me that it wasn't deep enough and that the jackals would come and dig her out if we didn't go deep enough. Poor guy. Poor Panda Kutty.

It's made me think about a lot of things, all of which won't do her justice by adding to this, her memorial post. Rest in peace Panda Kutty. I want you to know that you made a difference in my life, and that as sorry as I am to see you go, I really loved having you around and being able to pamper you in my own way.

:'-)