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Friday, June 09, 2006

Parody Extraordinaire

So there's this joke about a panda...but before I go on, here it is.

A panda walks into a café. He orders a sandwich, eats it, then draws a gun and proceeds to fire it at the other patrons.

Why?" asks the confused, surviving waiter amidst the carnage, as the panda heads towards the exit. The panda produces a badly punctuated wildlife manual and tosses it over his shoulder.

Well, I'm a panda," he says at the door. "Look it up."

The waiter turns to the relevant entry in the manual and, sure enough, finds an explanation that reads:

Panda. Large black-and-white bear-like mammal, native to China. Eats, shoots and leaves."


That was an example of how bad punctuation can affect the meaning of the sentence, sometimes drastically so, as the joke indicates. There is even a book with the joke's punchline as its title. It's by Lynne Truss. (Listen to an interview of hers about the book on NPR.)

There is also a parody on the book which is a collection of "Crap English and how to use it", according to the tagline. It's called "Eats, Shites & Leaves."

But then, I got a joke today that was a parody of the panda joke...and I have to admit it kept me in splits for a bit. Check out this example of correct punctuation...and check out the star :-D

A koala walks into a bar one night, slams his paw down on the table, and orders a drink. When he's done, slam goes his paw again for more. This goes on for about half an hour, and just when he was going to do it again, the barkeep tells him if he was looking for a good time, there was some one in the back room who could help him.

The koala decides why not and goes into the back room. There he meets a prostitute who is waiting for him. That night he has the best sex he has ever had. Afterwards, the prostitute turns to the koala and says, "
How about my money?"

The koala looks confused, so the prostitute brings out a dictionary and it says...
PROSTITUTE: Has sex for money.

In response, the koala turns to the definition for the koala and it says...
KOALA: Eats bush and leaves.


Hahahaha...!!! I don't know about you guys or anyone else, but I found that pretty damn funny. Just thought I'd share it with you.

Mahalo Uncle Ram
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