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Thursday, February 05, 2009

Confessions of a dangerous kind

The less said about this the better. Still, there comes a time in this person's life when I must own up to being what I am. This isn't an all-day-every-day kind of thing. It's just, well, something that I find I must steer clear of on occasion. Again, not all the time. There are times when I will embrace this aspect of my character when I think it's necessary, or when I'm feeling gleefully evil, in which case the pleasure would be all mine. Tee hee hee...

But, why admit this in the first place? What part of which process does making this admission complete? What is it a first step to? Can't people tell when I'm being an asshole and when I'm not? Do I have to tatoo "part-time asshole" on my forehead so that people know?

Dangerous though it may be, I'm enjoying this aspect of my character. I've spent too long trying to be nice and friendly and polite and all that nonsense, and I've only complained about how people have walked all over me. Now, I want to stop complaining. I don't care to attract attention by being unduly obnoxious, just a bit of "giving back as good as I get". If there's anything for people to complain to me about it should be because I didn't bend over and take it like a man. And that's ok. If they complain because I gave them reason to complain, then it's justified. It may sound strange, but it's strangely satisfying. So be it. That's the funny part. Well, at least I'm laughing.

So, I admit to being an asshole. That's just the way I am sometimes. There are plenty of times when I'm nice, but you'll have to be nice to me to be able to see that. Please don't try and mess with me. I'm too tired and I don't have the patience to deal with the nonsense that you may wish to dole out. So, what's the problem? You're like that too. And, what step are we now at? Now that we've both come clean. What next?
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