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Thursday, March 12, 2009

A Grand Finale?

Before I begin, I'd like to give credit where credit is due and say that Daya actually managed to find this and the last two pictures (Picture 1, Picture 2) that I posted on my blog on Anjori's Facebook page.

Here's a picture of Anjori and me. This was taken mid-May, 1998, immediately after our 12th Grade Graduation ceremony. The ceremony was conducted on one of our "covered courts," which to the uninitiated was our way of referring to the multi-purpose courts with roofs on them. The decorations were grand, there was a stage, rizors, a podium, lots of flowers, corsages, lovely dresses, the entire kit and kaboodle of assorted paraphernalia you can expect at an event like this. And, obviously, I don't have any pictures to show you any of this because I didn't happen to be taking any pictures. No siree. I happened to have been nursing what at that time could be described as the "mother of all hangovers" from spending an entire night smashed to bits. That's why, if you care to notice, I have a strange expression on my face -- don't I always -- and I've often felt like I don't look like myself in this picture. The hangover also probably explains the fact that as soon as the niceties were done with I untucked my shirt and got ready to go drink some more. The drinking binge the night before our graduation ceremony was due to a premature birthday bash for Anjori. The one I was headed to, after this picture was taken, was because we had finally graduated and were no longer in need of obeying school rules. Of course, the school will deny reports of any of this, but who cares anymore. This was a long time ago.

The two of us in this picture shared a very special, and in its own way rather strange relationship. It was intense, it was dramatic, and there were lots of things about it that I thought I'd never forget. But, that was because I was young, naive, and holding on to the assumed glories of the past to make sense of my present. No, to try and make my life seem worthwhile maintenant. We continue to be good friends, albeit on and off, but neither person is more than a phone call away. The funny thing is, I think a lot of my thinking about this time and her has finally changed. He he he. Oh, and that's definitely a good thing for me.

Here you see Anjori as she was -- and I'm sure she'll tell you that this isn't her best picture by any stretch of anybody's imagination -- back at the end of 12th Grade. For a more recent picture from a more recent post, visit this link. For anything else, look her up on Google. She's a celebrity now. :-D Yes, she's already done two movies (Life Mein Kabhie Kabhiee and 1920). Not to make any of what I'm saying next sound conciliatory or anything, but she's a good friend to those who know her well, and she goes way out of her way to help them. My only hope is that she's much closer to having her life figured out than the last time we were in touch.

Our friendship went through a lot of weirdness in the last couple of years, and although it didn't make a whole lot of sense to me, I have to thank this period of time for opening my eyes to the fact that I had built several castles in the sky that I was trying to keep afloat at any cost. The biggest cost was that incurred by the people around me who loved me but didn't get anything in return because I was still clinging to some non-existent hope. Tsk tsk tsk... All my fault, unfortunately. I'm always that much closer to figuring out what's wrong with me in these kinds of situations, these intense relationships, but I'm not there yet. It's alright. I've got time on my side. I'm tired of letting myself get carried away by dreams of dreams and whispers of sweet nothingness. It's sad that I'm reminded of these things when I see this picture, actually. Like I ended the last post that I wrote about this, "Goodbye...and thank you for staying awhile." Got to show gratitude to the memories, at least. :-)
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