This is quite a picture if I ever saw one. As is commonly the case, I thought it somehow reflected the splendorous tempest that seems to be the state of my life at the moment. Actually, well, I don't think this was by chance; the fact that I seem to be making the effort to bring things to a head is more than evident to me right now. Having to ask myself why I would do this, I'd have to immediately answer with shrugged shoulders and upturned palms in a most innocent display of "I don't know." But that's only the half of it.
On the other hand, there is the whole I'm still learning and re-learning some of the boundaries of my existence, in terms of what kind of person I can be. I want to know how far I'll go in trying to prove my point, and if ultimately, I will really put something as important as my life on the line to make my point. Maybe that's it. That's my ultimate purpose, perhaps. But, maybe not. We shall see.
Right now though, it feels like elements of my life are coming together like large coulds, and the sheer static that they contain will create a bolt of lightning so bright and deadly that it will shatter my world. Suprisingly though, I don't expect any thunder. No, the storm is the silent assassin that I've been weathering for years. In tandem, however, I stand little chance of surviving. But here I am. In the rain. Staring this twister in the face. Holding a large lightning rod with both my hands. Hoping that this final, brilliant flash will wake me up from this eternity of self-imposed confusion and mental anxiety. I'm better than this.
I dare any storm to knock me down.
Knock me down, but you'll never knock me out!